Despise Me

Last night I had the Philadelphia premiere of my film As Real as Your Life, the audience who was primarily there to see a Herzog film they showed directly after me, seemed to react pretty well - I had the usual slew of people who clearly were not big gamers telling me how enlightening the film was (which is good of course). As I was leaving one final dude pulled me aside to give comment about the film. I didn't ask if he was a gamer, but my gut instinct told me he spends a good number of hours at the computer. He introduced himself and quickly got to the point "thanks for showing your film, but to be honest I despised it." It was definitely the most negative review I'd gotten so far. He gave me a few reasons about the format of the film, the disjointed construction, etc etc...It was clear the film seriously bothered him, and I don't think it was because of anything to do with the film's style. It was much deeper than that, much more personal. I think he might have thought I was a big of a phony - a filmmaker posing as a gamer as opposed to the other way around. To be honest I don't have as much time to play anymore, and my addiction is certainly under control - when I show the film I sometimes have to pretend I'm still the addict they see on screen.

After the film, chatting with my friend Rich, I came to a new conclusion - I need to make a new film, I need to document some eloquent gamers explaining why they play, get them to open up about what games do for them emotionally. I don't think most gamers would be down with this sort of opening up - I think many people play to escape some aspect of their real life, especially their own shyness. This will prove an interesting challenge in the new film.